Wish List for Pilot Season

Here are a few things I wish writers would learn:

1. If you turn a cliche upside down, you do not end up with something fresh and new and interesting. You end up with an upside-down cliche.

2. Have a good answer if an innocent viewer should ask - as he should - "why are those people in love?" Important note: just because she (or he) is beautiful, does not mean he (or she) is worth pursuing. And it especially doesn't mean that I (or my wife) will care whether or not he and she (or she and he) ever get together.

3. If you only have one idea, don't write a television series. Please. Don't even start. And a hint: yes, "boy meets girl" is one idea; that doesn't mean "boy meets girl, boy loses girl" is two ideas.

4. Joseph Campbell was not a screenwriter. There are reasons that Joseph Campbell wasn't a screenwriter. Just because you've "studied" the so-called Hero's Journey does not mean that you understand story structure.

Here are a few things I wish producers would learn:

1. Just because you can tell there's a problem, doesn't mean you know how to solve it. Isn't that why you hired all of us?

2. Yes, you do have to pay overtime.